MOTHER'S DAY WITHOUT A CHILD
Mother's Day is celebrated in a breezy, feminine style, but for some women it is the worst day of the year. There are no flowers or macaroni artwork from your kid in kindergarten. There are no phone calls from colleges around the country. Sounds negative, right? Unless you have walked the walk of the childless not by choice, there is doubt that you can fully understand the grief that attaches to the inability to get pregnant. Many little girls grow up playing with their baby dolls and imagining that one day they will have their own baby. Generally in our society, there is no talk about what happens to a girl if giving birth doesn't become a reality. Most teenagers are obsessed with not getting pregnant, therefore when the biological bell rings in one's early 30's few give much consideration to what they would do if they could not conceive. I didn't. There are thousands of stories and even more versions of the same fact: It is unbelievably painful to celebrate your sisters, friends and co-worker's pregnancies and babies when you cannot have your own baby. And that suffocating feeling is what many women experience on Mother's Day. This day when mom's are celebrated dawns with gripping sadness for women in the midst of unsuccessful fertility treatments. It passes slowly for a woman who is trying to conceive when she learns instead that she has ovarian cancer and must have a hysterectomy. On your own street there might be an older woman not surrounded by pink wrapping paper today because long ago she was forced to bury her dreams of motherhood. In your own family you might have someone who is the auntie to many and the mother to none. These women share a unique and dark bond, so be tender. Today is a day of sad remembrance for them.